This is yesterday’s painting of the day. I REALLY like her. I’m not in love with her because she’s particularly well painted or anything special compared to my other paintings (meaning, I feel that I’ve done paintings hat were technically better). I like this painting SO much because something about her pulls me forward.
I feel like I’m engaged in a battle of wits, and I feel like she’s winning. Actually, I feel like she’s never lost a game of wits and she knew the second that she saw me how shit was going down.
I don’t think that she’s evil in any way, just a cunning trickster. It’s all in good fun, for her anyway. I don’t think she cares at all if you’re having any fun.
She’s all about confidence and has the highest self esteem in the known universe. She wouldn’t harm a fly, unless she needed to, but she’s not going to compromise herself in any way for anyone in the world.
The name Maci is a name that I made up for an invisible guide about three years ago. She was kind of like a higher self and a protector.
At the time I felt like I had made a lot of choices that led me to a place I didn’t want to be. I was having a hard time trusting myself. I thought that maybe naming an entity that was all knowing, confident and uncompromising in her love and care for herself, trusting herself completely to make the best decisions for her own future, would be PERFECT.
The ORIGINAL name I had for this painting was “Passion”. It didn’t feel quite right though. She is passionate, but there is so much more to her that I wanted to capture in her name.
I didn’t know what to call her, so I looked up “confident girl’s names” and the name Maci was in the list. I got those chills that you get when you can’t believe that something in your mind, something in your private inner world is reflected back to you so perfectly. Who is this that knows what is in my mind and shows it back to me?
Anyway, now I’m not sure I can sell her. I’m simply now sure it would be worth any amount of money to give her up. I have a crazy soul mate connection to this painting.
I think I have to keep her. I NEVER (and I mean EVER) keep my paintings. They are always for others. This one, was born for me.
BUT – I hope you love her as much I do.